Friday, August 29, 2008
My Brain is Fuzzy
Normally, this is my brain when deluged with children for several hours during the day, listening to chorus's of "Mom, I'm hungry", "I'm bored," "Mom, what happens when you cut the whiskers off the cat?", "Can I play the Wii/Nintendo? ", "I don't want to do homework -- it's summer!" and last but not least, "Why do I have to read?" this from the two youngest who haven't caught the reading bug that infests our family. But this isn't summer, this is the beginning of school -- the beginning of supposed sanity recovery time.
It's now the end of August, the last days of summer with it's scorching temperatures and whinny children. The beginning of school and the frenzied shopping for binders, paper, pens and glue. Oh, yeah. I guess that will do it too...dragging three children (at least it's only three now, instead of seven) through the store, trying to get them to focus on their class lists (if they have remembered to bring it with them) and not disappear into the games section or grab anything that looks "cool" off the shelves. Sigh. I have to keep reminding myself that I love being a mother.
Oh wait...I was the one that didn't want more than one in the first place -- but I've since resigned myself to the fact that I wouldn't give up a single one of them...most of the time.
But the brain is fuzzy. Part of the problem seems to be my writing habits, or lack thereof. I mentioned a while ago that I've been writing letters to my son who is in basic training. Upon reflection this morning, I realized that when I'm in letter writing mode, the creative writing suffers. Those years that I spent writing letters to everyone under the sun, were dry years for creative efforts. I don't remember writing a single story. However, when my letter writing stopped, the fictional stories bounded from my brain as if they'd been waiting for this chance to shine and come forth to the light. Who knew?
Since I've been writing my son like crazy (although last week and this week have been really slow for that -- he's been lucky to get one) other things have fallen by the way side, including inspiration for my blogs. Having to come up with something creative for a subject twice a week is making me scrape the bottom of the barrel, and I'm afraid that things are suffering because of it. Needless to say, I haven't really written anything in my stories since the beginning of August. It's been a very dry month in more ways than one.
I feel like things are coated in moth balls, and I'm wondering what it's going to take to blow the cobwebs away. I know there have been mention of things like Writer's Block, but that's not the problem. I have things in the head to write in regards to the stuff I've been working on, but I have no desire to write them. I have fleeting thoughts of "gee, I should work on that story", but It's very fleeting and I'm off doing something else. I have to force myself to sit at the computer sometimes too, which is odd for me. It's almost as if I'm avoiding it.
There are only two weeks until my son graduates, and during that time we won't be able to write him as much -- especially since the last week he wouldn't get them anyway. Then he'll be going into further training, and won't have as much time to be bored, and could also email us, which is a whole different aspect to writing that doesn't seem to sap my creative energy as much. So, the end is in sight, help is on the way, and I just bought myself a chocolate doughnut for the first time in months.
Things can only get better.