by G.Parker
I never thought there would come a time when I didn't want to lift the weights that I work with three times each week. I figured they would always be something I was going to be lifting now, in order to keep my weight in check and continue a healthy lifestyle.
That was until my personal trainer changed my routine this past week...ugh. I mean, that's why we hired her -- to help me get the best from my workouts. But, I didn't figure on this aspect. I'm now at a point where she's having me lift the weights till my muscles fail. If you've never experienced that, it's a strange sensation. You have determination to lift the object, but your muscles just say "NO - not happening." And then you do it two more times.
It's been interesting to see how my body responds.
Yesterday I was to the point where I wanted to cry. I'd never been so weak or so frustrated. I wondered if I would be able to convince myself to come back and do it again. I mean, who voluntarily goes through that kind of pain? I mentioned to another woman who was there working out that we actually pay these people to give us pain. Sigh. Well...I did it again today. I did pass on one of the exercises, but I did all the other ones. It wasn't as bad today, which is a good thing, because I really wondered if I could do it again.
Normally, they don't recommend that you do weights back to back. I'm supposed to do cardio in between, but I'm going out of town and won't be able to do the weight routine. I figure I can do the cardio wherever I end up.
It occurred to me that it's similar to writing. After you get that book written and edited and polished and sent out, how many rejects can you handle? Each one is like a knife wound. Ask those of us who have gotten several...I know Darvell and Nicole are way ahead of me.
I think it could possibly make you hesitant to send that baby out into the world, if it's going to keep coming back bloodied and torn. Fear builds as you wonder if the agent or editor is going to slash at your work or like it. For some people, fear can paralyze their creativity. They are overloaded with the 'what if' thoughts that crowd the mind.
You have to overcome. You have to push through the pain and despair and doubt to find your place of peace. To find where the adrenaline shadows the pain and brings the dream closer. Every day another word written, another step forward. Don't let fear keep you from your dreams and your creativity. Be the master of your fate. You can do it.
2 comments:
To add, even when you push to the point when you muscles fail, after drinking plenty of water, having plenty of healthy protein, your muscles repair, and you are left stronger.
It is the same with writing. I think the rejections (like the knife wounds you mentioned), can give us thicker skin. We might think we can't do it anymore, but after we take a breather and treat the wounds in a proper way, our muscles will get stronger.... and we will get better!
Great food for thought (no pun intended--I understand both struggles only too well)!
http://waitingontheworldtochangeithinknot.blogspot.com/
I just sent my first "LDS fiction" MS off this week. It's such a small market, and there are so few publishers that it's really scary. It feels different with the "normal" market because there are SO MANY options.
Right now I feel like one rejection will seal it up for me. I know there are several options. But "several" isn't a lot. Isn't enough.
The problem is that even though I KNOW I won't hear back for a while, I can't help but wonder each time I check my inbox.
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