This week has been kind of one of extremes. Extreme highs and lows. Monday and Tuesday we were preparing and having parties and celebrating my son's Eagle and his leaving for a mission. Wednesday was dropping him off and dealing with the empty spot in my home. A dog wandering around like she'd lost her best friend. My two youngest sons moving into his empty room with amazing speed.
When you are writing and trying to convey a feeling, are you able to call upon reserves?
I will forever be able to call upon feelings of an empty home now, despite the fact I still have three children living here. I know the empty spot in my heart that wasn't there before. Never mind that the child is doing something wonderful and I wouldn't have it be any other way. He's still gone. And when he comes back, he won't be the same -- he'll be a man and his own person. I remember him as a small child, scooting around the floor on his knees because he didn't want to walk yet, crying because he wasn't getting picked up. His earnest expression only last year when he tried to talk to his brother and resolve some of the conflict in our home due to his older brother's choices. I ache for the son I miss. I'm happy that he's making good choices, but things are never going to be the same.
This is feeling that I wish to convey in my writing. If I were writing a documentary, I wouldn't want it to be dry, I'd want the emotion to come through. I'd want the moments to be marked and the empathy to be felt from those reading it. I want the written word to have meaning in the heart of those reading it.
What is your desire with your writing? I hope it's a sincere and great one. Just like each of you. Keep writing, and putting your emotions on paper. You'll touch the heart of many people, and you'll never really know.