By Keith N Fisher
At family reunions, I’ve heard the stories of my father’s family growing up on the farm in Southern Alberta. One of the most repeated, is their method for taking baths. Water had to heated on the stove, so they started with a little water. The baby got the first bath and for each kid youngest to oldest, they would add more water. The last person to take a bath got a full tub, but . . . It’s not good to be last in anything. The last person in line gets the leftovers.
Another of the original members of my critique group moved recently, and I’m sad. I started that group and the original members were handpicked, they will always be some of my best friends. There are two other, newer members, but their kids sports commitments made them join another group. I understand. The other group meets later and closer to their home. Things change. Jobs come and go, along with sanity. Life goes on.
I was invited to come with them to their other group, but they already have ten people in that group. It might be good for me, but . . . I don’t know what I’ll do. Change is hard sometimes. Still, I believe we should adapt or die.
I also seem to be the last writer standing on this blog. Either my ways are too set to move on, or I drove everybody else away. I hope it wasn’t the latter. I continue to post, it has become part of me. I’ve also leaned on my critique group too much. They all got published. I’m still learning my craft.
So here I am. I just finished, possibly, the best book I can write. Does it get better? I don’t know, but I wonder if I missed a signal somewhere along the way. It’s true, I haven’t kept up with my self promotion. I hate job interviews because I hate selling myself. I know my performance is more than adequate, but I don’t want to have to prove my metal.
In a world where everything is for sale, self-promotion is a necessary evil, and I fail. Getting back to the point, however, I don’t want things to change. I got comfortable meeting once a week, learning from my friends and getting input about my female characters from the women in the group. In a life turned upside down, it was comforting to know I had my critique group and this blog.
Back in the beginning of this blog, I took solace in knowing my fellow laborers could entertain the masses. I didn’t feel the burden of being witty or thought provoking. I learned from my writer friends, and it was nice to be part of something helpful to other writers.
The original writers have almost all gone. Most of them felt they had to move on. Some, because their careers had reached a certain point that they needed to do other things. Others moved on because they felt nobody was reading. I can’t blame them for that. How can you write helpful information if nobody reads it?
I guess it doesn’t matter. Reasons for change are always subjective, anyway. I sit here posting and wonder why I’m still here. If change is inevitable, then I apparently, missed the memo. I post on other blogs, but the LDS Writers blogck is the one that grounds me. On another blog, I post under a pseudonym. I can write anything I want. Nobody cares, but nobody reads it either.
I’m not posting these melancholy thoughts to make an announcement of some kind, I’m just thinking. In a conversation with a friend about change the other day, he asked if I’m still writing. I said oh yes. It’s the one constant in my life. That’s true. With all the change I’ve forced myself to endure in the last few years, I’m still writing. Sometimes its golden, sometimes its crap, but I’m still writing.
Good luck with your writing—see you next week.